I turned 50 years old a couple of years ago. It sucked. I cried for days leading up to the dreaded day. Maybe it was my changing hormones or maybe it was me realizing that in fact, I am now, very clearly on the downhill side of life.
The most annoying part of all this was that people younger than me had been talking. Whispering about how old I was. “Did you know that Kelley’s 50?!!” “Shhhh…don’t say anything but Kelley just turned 50!” ‘Wow…that’s old, she looks pretty good though.” It’s odd, out of the blue people I don’t know very well were talking to me. Saying things like, “you look great, you’re so fit and your hair is really pretty.” “I’m so proud of you for not giving up!” I’d stand there listening to them thinking…thanks but, WTF makes you think you’re making me feel better?
Here’s the thing. Getting older sucks. The best thing we can do is to not think about it. Why bother. You’re screwed, deal with it and above all, don’t mess with Mother Nature. She clearly has a plan. If she gave you straight brown hair leave it alone. Making it curly or turning it some unnatural color will only make it frizzy and bite you in the ass later. If you have thin lips leave ‘em alone. Falsely plumped lips make you look like a fish when you’re young and a puffy fish when you’re old. Drink lots of natural beverages like water and wine and eat foods the earth gave us. Coke and Ding Dongs are not natural. Keep moving. Move all your body parts. Every day. Sitting still widens your ass and makes you a boring person.
Lastly…get out. Outside, out of town or just out of your own way. Make some stories. Because in the end, all you have are your stories. Let ‘em be amazing!
Who am I?
Since my 20’s I’ve spent most of my professional career as pseudo advertising executive who weighed up to 220 lbs. In my 30’s & 40’s I managed to drop a large amount of weight, keep it off, become an elite bicycle racer, certified cycling coach, artisan cheese maker and fitness fanatic. Currently I’m retired from the ad world working as a Personal Trainer. It is my hope that I can use my life experiences to inspire “real people” to get off their butts, out of their ruts and on the road to becoming happier, fitter people.
P.s. If you want more dirt on me, read this.