Physical Funness for the Motion Starved

Fit more fun into your fitness while exploring the outdoors.

Category Archives: Well-being


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All I want to do today is lay in the dirt

Yesterday I ate a butterfly, then I yacked it up. Ugh!

Some days I’m just not feeling it. Maybe I’m tired or cranky, who knows. The bottom line is, some days I just don’t feel like working out, eating right or doing all the things that I am “supposed to do.” I used to torture myself with guilt when I had these days, telling myself that I was a Big Fat Cow for slacking off, acting like the world would come to an end if I fell off my fitness routine.  Well…I slack off all the time and so far the world is still spinning, I still reach my goals and still look reasonably presentable.

We all have those days and we all need to give ourselves the “okay” to simply give in. Whether it be sitting down to a pint of Ben & Jerry’s because they’re the only ones who can heal your broken heart, or skipping your workout because you just can’t bare to deal with it today. The key is not to make it a habit. Take a day off if you need to and don’t give it a second thought. Just be sure to get back on the wagon tomorrow, you’ll have a whole lot more spunk for having done so. You can’t be expected to roll along the same path forever; detours are necessary for a successful journey. Remember that.


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A public service message from The Sample Lady

I got an email from my Mom today. It’s a bit of a rant as she’d had a hard day at the market. If you read my St Patrick’s Day post you know that my Mom is The Sample Lady at a “health food” store and has a bit of a gritty attitude when it comes to her job and the people she deals with on a daily basis.

Below you will find my mother’s email to me. I’m sharing the meat of the document word for word, I feel the contents are too good for only me to enjoy. Lessons for us all are contained herein.

Store Sampling (a loose definition)

Providing customers an opportunity to try a product before they purchase it and/or introducing a new product to customers.  And, when all else fails — how to get rid of crap you can’t sell before it goes “out of date.” Take note!

What Sampling is not

  • Lunch
  • Afternoon snack for little kids
  • Free food for teenagers
  • Supplemental meals for mooching employees
  • Free treats for a family outing

My Daily “Gross-Outs”

  • A woman reaching into the paper sleeves of freshly baked bread and squeezing each loaf — with her bare hand — to test for freshness.
  • A normal appearing man opening the door, reaching into the empty popcorn machine — and again with his bare hand — scraping up any and all popcorn residue left behind.
  • A regular “Old Fart” sampling olives with his bare hands from the olive bar.
  • A little kid washing his hands in the drink-sampling dispenser.
  • A woman sharing her sandwich — bite for bite — with her dog.
  • Kids digging into the bulk barrels with both hands — also eating from the bulk bins.
  • Little kids fondling rolls from bakery bins.
  • Woman spitting sample back in cup and handing it back to me.

Other things that piss me off

  • Stupid customers asking if sampling spoons are “clean” — no really, we collect up the dirty ones and re-use them — duh.
  • People eating lunch as they shop and not paying
  • Customers leaving dirty sampling cups, toothpicks ad napkins on sampling tray, they belong in the trash!
  • People taking samples without even making eye contact while on their cell phones.
  • People “loading up” on samples — as many as they can carry in both hands

Love Mama

After reading this I’d like to lock myself in the house and never go near a grocery store again. I guess the lesson here is mind your manners and remember that not everyone out there has much sense. Get your food from places that have the least amount of potential fondlers. Farmers markets are good as there are fewer people involved. Or, grow/bake/cook your own food. Do ya feel me?

Stay tuned — next week we’ll be looking at our butt cracks. Is yours crooked? If so what does that mean?

Enjoy the weekend. See you Monday, and happy April Fools Day!


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Is the Universe trying to tell me something?

Not again!

I did it again, sprained my ankle. The same one I messed up a few months ago. It sucks, I’m not a good sick person and I don’t deal well with immobility. I was running on the trail about 2 miles from my car and like the last time, my foot just turned under. Me, my favorite Lululemon togs and a sexy white tank top all became airborne just in time to for a slew of Trail Worker Dudes to witness the calamity. Landing, I slid along the path picking up leaves and sludge turning my white top into a camouflage print. Like I always do when I fall, I screamed. It’s a reflex I have no control over and it does well to magnify the peril. Once on the ground I looked up to see 3 very cute young guys standing about 20 feet away looking at me in shock. They just stood there looking at me with wide eyes. Maybe the scream frightened them? Nobody said a word, they just looked at me. Feeling a bit foolish I let them know that I was okay. ”No worries, I’m fine, this happens to me a lot.” Then one of them said, “Are you sure?” “Oh yea, I’m fine.” At that point they mounted their official vehicle and I was left to stumble back to my car some two miles.  As I dragged my rapidly swelling foot along the trail I began to speak out loud using words that might cause one to assume that I was deranged. Then the tears started to come. Poor me, I fell again! Life sucks, whatever will I do now? I might as well just lay down and die. Poor, poor me!

Everyone has had setbacks at one time or another. The only way to survive is to adapt. So I won’t be able to go for a walk on the beach tonight or run this weekend but I can certainly do plenty of other things.  I’m just going to have to look outside of my little box and find new and wonderful things to do.

It’s important to be adaptable and creative in all areas of life. If one thing doesn’t work then you have an opportunity to try something new.  Maybe my fall today was the Universe’s way of telling me to pay more attention to my bike or to work a little harder on my upper body. My arms are starting to look a little saggy…

I have to look at this as an opportunity and use it to my advantage. Something tells me that if I do this right I’ll be better for having had this little spill. After all, I’m a Scorpio, you can’t take us down, when we rise, we rise up even stronger.


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T-Minus 24 hours

A day at the beach

Happy Friday everyone. For me this week has flown bye.  Lots of family dramarama, this nasty weather and the anticipation of my little stair climb tomorrow has kept things moving at a frightening pace. Maybe that’s a good thing? While the added stress has me a bit put off, sometimes distractions have their benefits. The key is to find my focus on race day.

Anyway here we are, T-minus 24 hrs. In spite of the shitty weather I went for a little run along Baker Beach this morning to loosen up the legs. I must tell you, there’s nothing better than a run along the beach in the rain. Nobody was out, not even the naked guys. I easily found my rhythm and had a fantastic run. I’m ready, I’m hydrated, I’m rested and I’m lookin’ forward to kicking some serious stair climbing ass!

Why am I doing this? I signed up for this event thinking that I might encourage some of you to joining me. I thought it would be a relatively easy goal for anyone to accomplish and because it’s a very good cause. After all, I am rather fond of breathing and I am fortunate in that my lungs are healthy so I wanted to do what I could for the cause, as well as those of you who seem to want to reach new fitness heights. That and the fact that I like doing new and different things and this is something I’ve never attempted. Maybe more of you will join me in the next challenge?

So, there you go — I start climbing tomorrow at 9:00, be a sport and send me some good juju between 9 and 9:20, breath deeply and frequently. Hopefully, this stair climbing business will take me less than 20 minutes; I’ve got shit to do. Kra-zy! I’ll send an update via twitter if you’re interested. Check me @motionstarved or on this site under the photo to the right.

Stay dry and I’ll see you next week, kiss, kiss…

P.s. Weather Lady says the sun is on it’s way back to SF next week! Hang in there!


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Unflappable

Just don't look up!

It’s the week before the big Fight for Air Climb. Yikes, 1,197 steps up 52 floors. That’s a lot’a steps and it’s all taking place in the stairwell of the B of A building here in San Francisco. If I wanted to, I could start stressing myself out by thinking about what’s in store for me this Saturday, but I won’t do that. I know better. Why bother, it won’t make the event any less painful and certainly won’t make this week pass any more smoothly.

Here’s the plan — My training is complete. It takes 3 weeks to reap the benefits of training so there’s no need to go out and hammer out another hard training session. I’ll exercise this week but won’t do anything that might stress my legs. Lots of yoga and easy endurance work. All I can do is trust that I’ve trained well and let my body rest and recover from the past weeks of intense training. I’ll make sure to drink plenty of water, get lots of sleep and eat right, keeping the fiber flowing. I sure as hell don’t want to carry any extra stuff up those steps. Know what I mean? I’ll make sure I have the cutest possible outfit ready to wear. Shoes ready to go and all the information I need to smoothly pick up my race packet and timing chip on event day. Early in the week (today actually) I’ll make sure to read all event info so I know the exact details of what I can, and can’t take with me in the stairwell, where I can park and so on. I don’t want any surprises the day of the event. It’s important that on the big day all I have to do is show up, and race. I’ll get everything done before hand so I can focus only on doing my very best.

So there you have it. I am confident and ready to go, unflappable. On the day of the event I will find a nice pair of buns and follow them up the stairs all the way to victory. I will feel no pain and dance up the steps to the rhythm of my smooth breath.

The best part of all this, when it’s over I get to come up with a new way to torture myself. A new goal, get ready!

P.s. It’s not a good idea to try something new the day of an event. New shoes, new food, stuff like that. You don’t want to find that GU gives you the runs while you’re ascending an indoor stair case or running down the road with thousands of people, same goes for shoes and cloths you don’t want to find out that your new stuff chafes. Stick with what you know works. This is no time for surprises.


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A friend is someone you can depend on

Gracias Skinny!

Meet Skinny Scott, Mr. Skinny, or sometimes I just call him Skinny. Skinny doesn’t mind that I call him that; he knows he’s a little skinny. You should know, just because Skinny is skinny, that doesn’t mean he can’t kick the shit of the peeps down at the dojang and if you see Skinny on his bike and you’re near a hill, you should just get off and walk, cuz Skinny’s gonna mess with you. That’s what he does. He loves to hurt people on the hills, a benefit of being “skinny,” but either way, that’s Skinny’s way.

Anyhow — Skinny is my very good friend, without Skinny there would be no Motion Starved. I would not be here, nor would you. Imagine how life would be… I dedicate today, the last Friday of winter, 2011 to Skinny and to friendship.

The next time you hear from me it’ll be spring. A time for rebirth, renewal and regrowth. An exciting time full of energy, warmth, hope and endless opportunities if you’re open to them. Let us all enjoy this last weekend of winter, rest up, recover from your St. P’s Day activities and get ready, a new season is upon us!

In the spirit of friendship I want to thank all my friends (you know who you are, right?) for their support and encouragement while I venture into the world of fitness and twitter, and spewing my words across the entire universe. I wish us all a springtime full of love and adventure and amazing stories!

Thank you!

Till Monday…

P.s. “It is better to be in chains with friends, than to be in a garden with strangers.”

P.s.s. There’s gonna be a Super, Ginormous Full Moon this Saturday eve, check it out!


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Do whatever pleases you today

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Admit it: drinking green stuff is fun, no matter how old you are. Lets raise a glass today and make a toast to family, good health and good friends.

My Mom is The Sample Lady at a hoity-toity grocery store in Southern California. It’s the absolute perfect job for her, although she doesn’t see it that way.

I’ve never actually seen Mom workin’ her samples, but I have a pretty clear picture of what it must be like to come upon her at her table of petite bites of food. You see, Mom’s not by any definition what you’d call a “people person.” According to Mom, the people who come to her table are all “a bunch of fat pigs.” Most of them, either wealthy housewives or “spoiled brats” from the high school across the street. Apparently more than once Mom has told a greedy customer “you’ve had enough, go away.” While I think it’s pretty funny, I find it especially karmic, it wasn’t long ago when Mom’s favorite Saturday activity to go to Costco for “lunch.” Mom would push her cart right up to the edge of sample table so that nobody could get between her and the food samples. She would sample everything; if she liked it she would sample it again just to be sure. Mom would strategically move from table to table, sometimes picking up her pace if it looked like someone might get there before her. Even then she complained about all the “ fat pigs.” I find it especially amusing that she doesn’t see the irony in this. And they say there’s no such thing as Karma!

I digressed — what I wanted to say is that today Mom is making Colcannon for those brave souls that dare approach her sample table. Colcannon is a traditional Irish dish of mashed potatoes, milk, butter, cabbage and onion. Mom said “I don’t think it’s on your diet Kelley, but it’s yummy.” With that, here’s a recipe for Colcannon, it sounds gross to me but you may like it. I’m gonna celebrate today with a couple of glasses of Irish Whiskey and some green cookies. I know, probably not on “my diet” but WTF it’s a holiday! My advice, do whatever pleases you today!

I leave you with a St. Patrick’s Day Blessing

As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction.

Cheers!

P.s. I love you Mom!


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Spread the love

I love you!

This photo warms my heart! I love the dogs, they just love, love, love all the time, no matter how cranky you are.

My neighbor is a nasty woman. I’ve known her for 30 years and she’s always been nasty. It’s a shame, there is no visible reason for her to be so nasty but because she’s so mean her life has become miserable. Everything goes wrong for her; she has no friends, can’t keep a job and spreads her nasty attitude so nothing ever changes for her. Guess she never heard that you get what you give.

Seriously, on those days when you’re in an especially good mood doesn’t it just seem like things fall into place? Everything goes right and more often than not the love just snowballs and everything in life seems easy and wonderful.

Since Valentine’s Day I’ve been doing a little experiment.  I didn’t tell anyone, it was my secret. I decided to make a conscious effort every day to take niceness to the next level. All I did was pay a little extra attention to the people I cross paths. I didn’t go crazy I simply paid attention to the people around me. I was uncharacteristically patient and nice while waiting in line for half an hour at the post office. I chitchat with the boy behind the counter at the grocery store for longer than I normally would have and smiled at strangers rather than snub them. Stuff like that.

On my way to do errands the other day I walked past the man who owns the restaurant across the street from my house. He was taking in the “open” sign. For 3 years we have been crossing paths and for 3 years we have smiled and said “hello”. Today when he said “hello” my lips smiled extra wide and I asked him how his day had been going as I had noticed that his restaurant seemed busier than usual.  This small effort turned into 2 hours of chatting, lots of good coffee and a really yummy brunch that my new friend prepared for me in his closed for the day restaurant. More importantly it felt really nice to be nice. I felt good, my new friend felt good and now we are both rolling the Feel Good Snowball.

After my brunch I went home to clean up the garbage that my nasty neighbor had tossed over the wall into my yard. I considered tossing it back over to her side but I couldn’t do it. My initial reflex was to toss it back thinking it would say, “you Crazy Cow you can’t toss trash in my yard and get away with it!” She had made me angry and I realized that she was spreading her nasty–tude and melting my Feel Good Snowball, I wanted no part of it. I picked up the trash, put it in the bin and that was the end of it. Feel Good Snowball still intact and rolling.

Be nice. It’s infectious and it’s fun to see where your snowball will roll, and whom it might roll into.

I leave you with a quote.

If you would like to spoil the day for a grouch, give him a smile.  – Author Unknown

 


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Random bits

Happy Friday!  I know some of you are pretty happy the week is over. I hope the weekend serves you well and you find yourself rested and recovered in time for Monday (or, is that a stupid thing to say?).

Today I’m sharing some tips from my friends.

  • Drink your water – Marathon Louie thought he was “all that” by doing a nice tempo training run and then attempting what he assumed would be an easy spin class. Unfortunately with all the training ML lost track of his hydration level. With that, the double workout proved too much for the lean, fit gent. Post “spin” Louis spun himself right onto the floor and awoke to find himself sprawled out and surrounded by some very nice EMT’s. His advise. Drink up!
  • Wash your stuff – Skinny Scott wanted me to remind everyone to wash their fruits and veggies. Even the ones that you plan to peel. It’s not just about obvious dirt, it’s about all the nasty stuff that gets on there from all the different folks handling it.  Mr. Skinny found himself with a case of “The HoneyMustards” after eating a mango that he peeled but must have picked up some fungi from the cutting board. Best way to wash your stuff is to run lots of water over it. Just to be safe, Skinny suggests washing the pre-washed lettuces that comes in a bag. Need I say more?
  • Sleepy? – Nancy The Guit wondered why she was tired all the time.  She was sleeping well at night, eating right, getting plenty of vitamins and her hormones were in check but she still felt sleepy all day.  What’s up with that, she thought so she asked her Doc and found that she was taking twice the recommend dosage of melatonin.  She’s now cut back and behold, she’s not tired anymore. Watch your dosage, take the recommended 3 mg at most and when you wake in the morning turn on a bright light to trigger your body to stop making it’s own melatonin. More is not better!
  • GP-2011 says “lube your business” – Body Glide is for beginners, too. There’s nothing like getting ass-burn, or chafed cheeks from a vigorous workout. Anywhere you sweat and have a little friction is prime real estate for chafing—arm pits, thighs, butt cheeks. GP recommends body glide, Vaseline, A&D ointment—she’s even used her kids’ diaper creams—use whatever you’ve got, but the body glide is greaseless, easy to roll on, and doesn’t smell like baby powder. Better lube your business, or you might feel the burn—and not just in your muscles.

Learn from their mistakes, I’ll see you on Monday. Next week I’ll come clean and let you have a look at my abs.  We’ll see if all those crunches from my ab challenge did me any good. Stay tuned…


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The Rules

Even-Steven

I went shopping this weekend and bought two things.  I bought a book by Michael Pollan called Food Rules. Maybe you’ve heard of it.  My friend Pauline told me about it, it’s all the rage and a #1 NY Times Bestseller.  According to the cover it’s “an eater’s manual.” Basically it’s an easy to use book of rules that takes the complexity out of eating. For instance rule #37 is “The whiter the bread the sooner you’ll be dead” (referring to the fact that you should be eating whole grains). The final rule is rule #64, which reads “Break the rules once in a while.” I like that one; in fact, the second purchase I made this weekend was a box of Girl Scout Cookies. By the way, rule #19 is “If it came from a plant, eat it; if it was made in a plant, don’t.” Looks like I’m even-steven.

As for the Girl Scout Cookies, I won’t make excuses. Excuses make you appear weak and nobody wants to hear them anyway.  I bought the cookies and I ate them, they were good. I did it because I told myself that I wanted to support the GS’s but the truth is, eating them brought me back to the time when I was a GS. One season I ate so many GS cookies that I racked up a bill of over $150 which my Dad had to cover. That’s when I learned not to make excuses. How do you explain why you ate dozens of boxes of cookies? Temporary insanity? Or, “face it Dad, I’m just a pig,” would have gone over better.

Anyway… Back to rule #64, break the rules once in a while. Pollan says, and I agree “Obsessing over food rules is bad for happiness, and probably your health too.” Worrying about nutrition will make you no healthier or slimmer. Relax, throw “the rules” out the window once in a while, what matters is everyday practice. That can be said for everything in life, don’t you think?

Tomorrow we’re talking about setting goals. I don’t understand why so many of you are afraid to commit to even the smallest goal.  Yea, I know it’s frightening but seriously, aren’t you getting a little bored?

Happy Monday!

p.s. Rule #43 – Have a glass of wine with dinner. Drinking a little every day is better than drinking a lot on the weekends…